3.24.19

This morning at church I was observing a group of older gentlemen who were with a caregiver. She was attentive to them, and she kept a watchful eye over them, checking on them through the service. And just like grief does, it came out of nowhere and took my breath away. I could see my Gray sitting among them someday as an adult long after Mike and I are gone. I had to leave because I was bawling, and I couldn’t even explain what I was feeling to Mike. I was sad because someday Gray may very well be in a group home setting. But the longer I thought about it, I was hopeful because these gentlemen still were at church - they were involved in every part of the service. They were greeted joyfully by those around them. I was encouraged by the kind way their caregiver worked with them. Being a special needs parent is such a tricky thing and there are so many emotions to manage. I am glad today that I didn’t get stuck on just the sadness - that I could see past that to something hopeful. Maybe I am turning a corner here ☺️