I thought the hardest time of parenthood yet - despite pregnancy and the actual having the baby process - was getting an autism diagnosis for our oldest son. Until this week, when our middle son was also diagnosed with autism. I am not ready to talk about it yet, but I know a few people who still read this will pray for my kids and pray for us - because heaven knows we need it. The last three days have been difficult - but yesterday I felt better. Then today hit, and it's fresh everything all over again. I have been slowly sharing the news about Easton, and I got some responses that were so kind that they made me cry. Then I got a few where I was like - WHAT on earth does that even mean? I do not understand people and will continue to limit what I share with who. :(
It's amazing to me that two kids with the same parents and the same syndromes can have it affect them so differently. Grayson's language is very limited - he is considered - at this point in time - non-verbal. Where Easton sang the ABCs loudly and cheerfully with his classmates at his end of the year preschool program and says the funniest things with comedic timing!
On top of this all - or maybe I should say it laid the foundation for the past two weeks of "what the heck-ness", a visiting (foreign) missionary told us that Grayson is demon-possessed and offered to come to our house to exorcise him. When I asked this missionary - how can this be? He is an innocent child. He answered gravely that witches are everywhere and one had placed a curse on our family - generations ago. Obviously this missionary is from a different culture, but I urged him to read about autism. I know that Grayson is not demon-possessed - the thought never had crossed my mind before because WHY WOULD IT? But to hear that someone feels that way about your son - especially someone that deeply rooted in your own faith - well...its upsetting to say the least. I was so shook up from that experience, that I could not stop talking about it for days. It still bothers me.
So that's all for now, as that's all I have time for. I don't get much down time anymore - I feel like I have to constantly observe my kids because someone might be choking (happens more often than not) or someone is trying to bust a hole in the drywall (this has also happened in the last week.) I don't have any idea why God made me a special needs mother and gave me not one but two kiddos on the spectrum. Why??? Is it to help others down the road? At this point I can't figure anything that I would ever say would bring hope and encouragement and support to another special needs parent. Maybe I am too deep in the trenches. Maybe someday I will be able to encourage but today, I can't foresee it.
It's amazing to me that two kids with the same parents and the same syndromes can have it affect them so differently. Grayson's language is very limited - he is considered - at this point in time - non-verbal. Where Easton sang the ABCs loudly and cheerfully with his classmates at his end of the year preschool program and says the funniest things with comedic timing!
On top of this all - or maybe I should say it laid the foundation for the past two weeks of "what the heck-ness", a visiting (foreign) missionary told us that Grayson is demon-possessed and offered to come to our house to exorcise him. When I asked this missionary - how can this be? He is an innocent child. He answered gravely that witches are everywhere and one had placed a curse on our family - generations ago. Obviously this missionary is from a different culture, but I urged him to read about autism. I know that Grayson is not demon-possessed - the thought never had crossed my mind before because WHY WOULD IT? But to hear that someone feels that way about your son - especially someone that deeply rooted in your own faith - well...its upsetting to say the least. I was so shook up from that experience, that I could not stop talking about it for days. It still bothers me.
So that's all for now, as that's all I have time for. I don't get much down time anymore - I feel like I have to constantly observe my kids because someone might be choking (happens more often than not) or someone is trying to bust a hole in the drywall (this has also happened in the last week.) I don't have any idea why God made me a special needs mother and gave me not one but two kiddos on the spectrum. Why??? Is it to help others down the road? At this point I can't figure anything that I would ever say would bring hope and encouragement and support to another special needs parent. Maybe I am too deep in the trenches. Maybe someday I will be able to encourage but today, I can't foresee it.
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