count your blessings...

I feel the onset of another wave of anxiety coming over me - something that I have been dealing with all day. I think that if you could mark my anxiety on a scale of 1 to 10, it's probably about a 30 right now.

So I thought it would be perfect time to sit down and count some blessings.

- Tonight Easton gave me a hug and told me, "I am so happy!"

- Grayson told me when he needed his diaper changed tonight. He is doing so awesome at that, and I think he is getting closer to potty-training!

- My dad and mom got Mike and me a unit that plugs into the wall and you sweep your dirt into it. No more bending over to use the dust pan! It's made sweeping the floors so fun and that means it happens more often now ;)

- My dad and mom took Daisy last week. I am thankful. I went to visit today, and she FLIPPED OUT. Unfortunately she also thought I was taking her home :(

- I have the laundry going and the dishwasher but my house is far from picked up. At least I am making some progress in those areas.

- Almost 39 days and counting until Mike's schedule changes. I am not excited or anything.

- Today while Grayson was at school, Mike and I went for a drive with Easton. And wowza. It was just what I needed and kept the anxiety away for a short time. It was so nice to just talk to Mike. I used to drive all the time - I have put about 25K miles on my car in the year I have had it! But with Grayson getting car sick, those drives are over.

- When I picked Grayson up at school today, his teachers were laughing a little bit because they put "snow" - just white polyfill with glitter - in the sensory table - and Grayson was perplexed. He refused to touch it, and when I went to show him that it was safe, he batted my hand away like "It's not safe, Mom!" It made me laugh a little bit to see him cautious because he is rarely ever cautious! :)

Well I guess those aren't so much blessings, but maybe they are really :)

Thanks for letting me share. I always get really nervous around bedtime because it is usually a huge battle. It's 9 pm and my kids are still up and running around actually. :-/


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

43 and worried

I turned 43 yesterday.  A few weeks ago, I had to get my license renewed. I was feeling okay until I pulled out my old license and went to hold it up against my new license image. Mike caught me doing this, and he said, "NO! Don't do it, Erin!" which made us both laugh until I looked down and was shocked by the contrast. Four years ago, 20 pounds lighter (at least), smiling, hair perfectly done (or as well as I could do hair which isn't ever that great), I looked at least my age. Mike once remarked that of all the many license pictures he sees, mine was a really great picture. (But I know four years ago, life was no easier than it is now - in some ways it was harder.) But then the current picture. No life in the eyes or maybe just a lot of sadness, an abundance of wrinkles, hair that was out of place, and attempt at a half-hearted smile and a few additional chins. Haggard is the word that came to mind. Stress has not been kind to my appearance. I mentioned this to my ...
Read more

He's he-ere!

Image
Introducing... Grayson Michael Born 11/25/12 at 3:02 am Grayson entered the world via emergency c-section. Mike got to step into the role of Daddy immediately and went with the baby while I was in the recovery room. They got to spend some time bonding in the nursery. Grayson is such a joy! He and his daddy hit it off immediately. There is nothing more attractive than watching your husband turn into a daddy. Be still my heart. We were in the hospital for SO many days...I could not wait to get home. I missed my bed. Which funny enough, I haven't gotten to sleep in since that first night home. Taking the steps more than once a day is just too difficult right now. So for now, we have been crashing on the couch. Unfortunately Gray had problems with jaundice, and he had light therapy with a bili blanket. Mike told people his son was rocking a low profile LED light bar - just like a police cruiser ;)  I love his little frowny face :) ...
Read more

Ready for the next season...

Image
Usually I love spring. But this year is a different story. Spring has been mostly gray, cold and dreary - and with it, it has brought a great deal of heartache. With the uptick in aggressive behaviors from Grayson (thanks a lot, puberty) and the realization that we are now a year into being provider-less, to being told that Gray was too severe for one provider company, to having to research and call around to group homes to see if they are a good fit for Gray,  to Grayson's constant elopement attempts, to realizing that Grayson goes to therapy and comes home...he has very little to do for fun and he has no one outside of the family or his dedicated therapists to invest in him.  To make matters worse, right now Grayson gets very upset - to the point of property-damaging, when either Mike or I leave the house without him. His team is going to work on that, but it has been very limiting what we can do. The walks I used to take that I enjoyed so much to clear my head are in the pa...
Read more